The Blind Escort
we all experience some things at certain points of our life,
some are low points, and some are high points,
to me it is always the wrongs or lows that make me see things in a perpespective that i would not usually see,
it is the same example as you see a dark alley in the street near your house but you do not go there,
cause A – you rather stick to your usual route
or B – they tell you to stay away from there.
i learn to accept the fact that life is not a fairy tale, it is a documentary as what Johnny says.
as a person i should stop blaming myself for every little thing,
it is not my fault, entirely. it is no one’s fault.
it is just not meant to be, it is not meant to be.
the truth hurts, yes.
the traveller chooses his own path,
the tango dancer chooses who he wants as a tango partner,
a businessman chooses which business he wants to invest his money in,
Parnassus chooses to create his own imaginary world, and he chooses to be immortal
Spiderman chooses to use his powers to help people while Doc Oct uses it for evil,
i will not say i am totally okay, neither will i say that this is something that affects me so.
i also do not wish to come to the point where i will start hating, because i know that once this 2 threads meet,
i explode, just like what happens in New York 10 years later,
the percentage of survival? only 0.07%
whatever we do, whatever the way we want to think
whatever paths the traveller chooses,
whatever world that Parnassus creates,
whatever powers we got,
it is all about choice, how do you want to use it,
i always remember what Ben Parker said “with great powers comes great responsibilities”
as for me, i have choosen the path that is pain but yet a selfless act to do,
i lost yes, i did mention before but to me i feel like a winner
maybe this is not so, but i do not want to regret that i have said that
it is actually not that bad, though yes right now the path is uneven
i am disliking the fact that i got the worst position ever,
the position that i was vying for but lost,
sometimes as a person, i would wonder
how in the world did some people get so lucky,
always getting the ones that they want,
to me this is never the case.
why did i have to be blinded by that thread in the first place?
or why does a certain coloured thread have to exist that cuts the binds of the black and red thread? and you feel shock that all along that thread was already there actually.
i got a couple of wristbands, and i wear them to remind me to never give up
for instance i have this green one that says “peseverence”
a blue one that says “livestrong”
a pink one that says “peace”
and one yellow and green one binded together.
of course the classic helix symbol, yep my name is Joanne Helix.
when i fall, hit the ground, i pick myself up, and i will survive
do not resent me,
do not remember me as the one who showhand but failed terribly,
do not erase me in your memory,
do not judge me,
instead, remember me,
as the kid who gave it her all,
the kid who silently escorts you to class,
the kid who often hopes that you are okay
the kid who loves seeing you being happy,
the kid who wants you to be happy no matter what,
and most importantly, as your best friend. the one that you hang out with and laughed at all the randomly wrong things
i got a name stuck in my head and i call it “the blind escort”
i have no idea either, the name escort sounds really deep and strong
while blind adds on that extra element of selflessness in it, cause i was once blinded and am still blinded
so put it together you get : the blind escort
now we are simply Peter and Claire,
Scooby and Shaggy,
Pete and Patrick.
but i hope you see what goes inside this,
the endless hopes that i wish that you stay happy in whatever you do, and be happy with your other half.
you are not alone, no body is ever alone
even if there is no one with you in the room,
but there is still the bits and pieces of a person’s soul lingering around watching over you
there is still the invisible thread winding, twirling, twisting, moving to reach out to you.
even when you depart out of this place, there is the beautiful butterfly that flies around your grave.
always believe in yourself-this is a message to all those lonely/broken hearts out there.
let us run
The rain is gray
Outside and in here
It is gray
Dark walls have blocked my escape [lit: vanishing point]
The lights go off
I close all doors
The rooms full of visions from you
My heartbeat lets the ground vibrate
I have nothing to lose anymore
Oh
Let us run
When darkness comes
Somewhere our future has started
Behind the horizon
Oh let us run
Until the night is lightening
And until the last rain
Of the world
Falls apart over our heads
I walk on the rails
I let myself be dragged along with the clouds
And count every step
Without meaning
To somewhere or other
I don’t know what’s coming
I don’t know what has been
I only know
That you’re not there anymore
The wind wakes me up
I realize that I am running
How deep is too deep
How far is too far
Where is the beginning
And the end of the time
Give me a meaning
Please bring me there
welcome to the untitled no love
it funny how music connects the 2,
its funny how in every kawan talk that we had, music is the main things
or at least comes up in your minds
its funny how we said we cheated using music to help us in our academic grades,
its funny how you used “untitled” for your interview,
while i used “welcome to my life” for my literature, and “no love” for my composition
its funny how we laugh at certain songs
its funny how we talk about “our firsts”
like how “collide” was the first ever song you mastered on the strings,
while “misery business” was the first song that established me as the kid who sang loudly in the room alone
its funny how our parents got us started on Bon Jovi, embedded it into our lives
its funny how we recite them music lyrics,
everything about it is just funny, and one things for sure,
music is the key to our life,
without it is a good as being as assassin and taking away our lives.
Music, with love.
-BELIEVERS NEVER DIE-
as written by JoanneH
inspired by a true story.
Untitled
this entry is all about friday, Feb 5.
have you ever felt they joy in your heart when you do good deeds to random people that you do not really know/random strangers?
i know society these days, people cannot be bothered about people they do not know.
or they are just not brave enough or dare to do it.
i came to realise that little good deeds you do, goes a long way and simply just brightens up your day.
let me give an example,
today when i was walking to blk 23 for AEEPS class, i saw a senior of mine,
well i know her name but we never talked before
and she was in the same lift as me, i was near the lift buttons there and as she was carrying stuffs, i helped her to press level 6, which was where her class was at
and she said “thank you”
and my reply was “sure, sure”
a simple “thank you” just makes my day,
well in general i do not expect and form of reponse, or anything,
as a person i just do what i feel is right at that time, as long as i feel good inside thats all that matters,
but in any case, it put a smile on my face over the little thanks
the little things in life like this, though to many of us, may seems like “no big deal”
but if we think deep and long enough we will go to appreciate such kind thoughts, gestures.
that small moment sort if made me change my perception on people, well it did abit, it has a deep profound meaning towards it, and right now i cannot really describe it out.
moving on to the next part,
EEPS did soldering today, was pretty fun, i soldered for the first time actually
for most of them it is their second time (cause that time i left early to help out at the open house)
but in any cause teacher was nice, he taught me from scratch,
at first i soldered wrongly, and some parts was totally bleah
in the end,
was happy with my IC stereo amplifier, next week is testing session.
then at 1pm break, met up with kawan,
which was the best moment of the day,
because we cleared up our misunderstandings and are both cool about it now
like Scooby and Shaggy, Peter and Claire, Pete and Patrick.
if you have noticed i have removed all the “Heartbreak warfare” posts
well simply because i do not want to talk about that matter anymore
case is closed, and to me i do not want to spend the rest of my life thinking about the not so good scenes
move on, take the chance and be strong
i have come to realised that yes you can name all your friends in facebook, etc
but what really matters most is, who is the friend that you feel most comfortable talking to?
who is the friend that does more than saying hello and goodbye?
most importantly who is your real friend?
Kawan is my best friend, and to me our friendship is priceless.
i always hated it whenever the friendships i had always faces several bad patches,
it is never like those “oh so perfect, we never argued before in our whole life”sort, good for you if you have a friendship like that
but at the end of the day i have come to realise that all this is a test,
and it is how you handle it.
and now this happens to kawan and I,
overall, i am happy with the turn out,
the results is that : we are still best of friends.
as a friend, i will go through the extra mile,
i will take note what my friend likes and try to get it for him/her on their birthdays or any special occasions
as a friend i respect you, you respect me, and we are on the same ground,
as friends we folie a deux, a term called “a madness shared by 2″
and when kawan is happy, im also happy for him.
i may have lost, but in my heart i feel like i am a winner
i have already checked off the things i wanna do in my list,
a HERO never looks back, and i am the HERO,
i got most out of everything and this is something that no one can beat
you do not have to move, you do not have to speak, just feel the warmth inside your heart.
i am so fired up, that i ran around blk 23 like some kid and paraded around with Barack tee, like ding dong,
now, AMT class, was fun too,
created a track using logic, more touches to be added in next week, then friday is the presentation day,
woo hoo can do this man.
overall i am really happy, i really am.
so what if i have lost?
to me i am still a winner, a big winner.
most importantly, the friendship did not die, it never dies.
check this out, i realised i always take photos in this very same place
blk 23 oh blk 23 you hold so many fond memories for me.
FALL OUT BOY I AM WITH YOU! <3
so i saw this is Pete’s blog, and a whole surge of feelings overwhelms me that i decided to copy and paste it here-reblog.
if you area FOB fan like i am, you will understand why i feel so much when i read this.
or at least by reading this and the choice of words used, you feel teary eyed.
a simple thank you..
to start this off… i’m going to be blunt and honest. i have no idea what is going on. i haven’t talked to any of the guys specifically on the matter. so for those of you who are reading this blog in hopes of an answer, or in hopes of getting more information..i am sorry to say that i am going to disappoint you.
i’m writing this blog to say that i support them no matter what. i realize people are going to tweet me and post “you are a brown noser” or “stop kissing so much ass”…but to be honest..i don’t care. (no pun intended) fall out boy is one of the few bands who have a had a significant impact on my life and as an artist. here is a picture of me and pete from five or so years ago. my brace face and all. the first time i ever crowd surfed was to “tell mick…” and i swear to god pete pointed at me as a floated across the crowd pointing back at him, screaming the words that he poured his heart, soul, and un-trimmed chest into writing. first time i got kicked out of a concert? fall out boy. i was singing along to “saturday” and accidentally punched a security guard in the jaw while throwing my fist up to a break in the bridge. fall out boy were a group of guys..just like us. some considered them underdogs..yet they took the world by storm. patrick has taught me that singers in this genre don’t just have to play three power chords and hit simple cheap notes when they sing. we can be soulful.. we can actually sing with a little bit of emotion. patrick has taught me so much about being myself as a singer, artist, and as a person..and that as long as i am honest with myself..people will follow.
i was just like a lot of you guys. i’d ditch school, camp out at the venue the morning of the shows, and stand outside in the cold waiting for the guys to come outside so i could nervously shake their hand and tell them that their music had changed my life. i knew that they probably got it three hundred times a day..but i didn’t mind. they always made me feel like it meant something to them. and to this day…i believe it did.
i have fall out boy to thank for almost everything i have. pete listening to me sing at a gym class heroes video shoot senior week during my finals. he was dressed up as elvis, but still found time to give a nerdy little vegas kids with braces a shot at playing a song or two on guitar. they invited me to come out on tour with them for a few days…where me and patrick ended up forming our song “bounce” and talking about hell boy comics. pete has also taught me not to take naked photos of myself…haha just kidding 
i can still remember waking up at pete’s house to hemmingway attacking my face as if it was normandy, and pete laughing like an 8 year old as he filmed it on his old school video camera.
i apologize for getting so nostalgic on you…but i want you to know that i am right there with you guys. it has hit me hard like i’m sure it has all of you. here is what you have to think about though…
fall out boy will never be completely over.
i have enough memories to last me three lifetimes. they’ve put enough wind in my sails to push me around the world a dozen or so times. they won’t be forgotten. how many bands that you listen to were started because of fall out boy? or at least we’re inspired by their songs and sounds. fall out boy wasn’t just a band. it was a movement. it was the light between the clouds that showed that us kids can become something great. it was the fact the we can all change the world in our own ways. even if we all feel like underdogs sometimes. how can we be mad or upset with them when they have given us so much? i have heard some of patrick’s new stuff…and it is absolutely amazing. pete seems to be getting into something everyday that’s groundbreaking, new, and exciting. none of our boys are going anywhere. we need to be proud of them. i’m going to support them like they supported me. when i was lonely in my bedroom..i could put on my fall out boy cd and escape for a few minutes. have you guys seen how big little bronx is getting? isn’t he a beautiful little boy? how amazing is that for pete? they’re growing up just like we are…and they deserve a round of applause. a standing ovation. who knows what they’ll do in the future..but we all know what they have done in the past. no one can take fall out boy away from us…
not even them personally.
-alexander deleon
a class act.
Bedussey and Pancho
“you’re wearing wire man, you’re wearing a fucking wire!”
Alice(Underground)
Tripping out, spinning around
I’m underground, I felt down, I felt down
I’m freaking out to all am I now
upside down and I can’t stop it now
it can’t stop me now
I’ll, I’ll get by
I’ll, I’ll survive
while the worlds crashing down,
while I fall and hit the ground,
I will turn myself around,
don’t you try to stop me
I, I walk around
I found myself in Wonderland
get back on my feet on the ground
is this real, is it pretend
I’ll take a stand until the end
2 X
I’ll, I’ll get by
I’ll, I’ll survive
while the worlds crashingn down,
while I fall and hit the ground,
I will turn myself around,
don’t you try to stop me
I, and I walk around
and the random photo of the day is…
treble clef necklace, on my schoolbag! haha nice!
when it rains. on this side of touch it touches everything, say it again and mean it.
Shah showed me this! wah nice! Paramore and Johnny! when Johnny started singing i went OMG!
Alright I believe ya, but my Tommy Gun don’t
heyloo once again back!
well this friday there are a couple of things to talk about,
starting with 2 shocking news in Singapore
1st i heard was : THE KILLERS CONCERT IN SINGAPORE GOT CANCELLED!
they were supposed to perform at the Singapore Indoor Stadium on sunday, 24 Jan.
the fans who bought the tickets are very disappointed, thats for sure.
i hope they will reschedule their concert date.
2nd shocking news : 987Dj Daniel Ong is leaving Radio to spend more time with his family.
i am really going to miss Dan the man! he was the first jock i ever knew, and that was how i got started listening to the radio too, i love his shows, and yep over the years people recognise his voice on tv and such
Dan says he will still do media related work like outdooe hosting,
i will Miss Dan alot! Dan the man! whatever you do, all the best!
okay so now the 2 shocking news are said, im going to talk about my day.
school was alright, rainy in the morning and everyone is pretty tired.
EEPS just practised the olliscope, while eg2 is differentiation trigo.
amt class was cancelled, so we just played games and watched videos
got back AEL paper, YATTA I PASSED!
told kawan about it, and he acted as if he was the one that passed his test, not me! damn funny!
should have video taped his expression!
then met Sebbie at Cheers and headed to KAP for dinner! woo hoo! so fun!
1st time out together!
and played with photobooth!
HAHAHAAHAH Sebbie like POP ART!
LOL we experimented with all the effects in photobooth! so fun!
Kawan and Sebbie, you 2 are the coolest kawan ever!
you 2 make my friday a happy one! when it started out as crappy
and sorry the 2 of them are priceless! ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba
okay KAWAN outside now! hahahaha
